Fiction

Fragmenti

by Neelima K E

I killed my husband today. There was no hue and cry as he lay there dying. I expected a dying man to make more noise.
But then I haven’t stared at a dying thing at such close proximity before; I wouldn’t know. There are a lot many things I do not know. I have always played it safe.

Highest possible scores in exams? Check.

Dream job (whose)? Check.

Exponential salary package (Like really!)? Check.

A life of checks and balances. I had kept my head low, like an ostrich burying in its own shit. .only I was better.

They said the incident unhinged me..they really had no clue. “I would have killed him myself if he hadn’t done himself in”, I heard my father confess late one night as I lay awake. They had no idea that I willed it in the first place. If only he could hold on..

The proposal gave me purpose. .a convenient ruse to move on. He had never looked me in the eye before that day. It was because I was her friend. We all knew that and strangely enough, understood. She was for me the aftermath of a gory afternoon covered in blood and refuse..his image couldn’t have been any different.

Even so I saw my mother frown as they considered this turnabout. Eventually, I saw them give in. “Shared grief is the strongest foundation”, I heard his mother mutter behind the teacup while I served snacks. His smile that day was reassuring.

The little life together was comfortable very much. “Don’t starve yourself. .you are already sickly thin”..he was concerned. “Don’t stuff yourself up to please no one, we like you fine the way you are….” Oh..married life was too accommodating. Newfound love and the little safe haven suffocated much and that is when I went looking.

“We call him the Monster kaaku in secret”..the little girl never trusted much.

“A true gentle man that husband of yours..never figured why the kids couldn’t get along”..Mrs Kapoor Sharma seemed genuinely clueless.

“Hide from the monster kaaku we say..then we run and hide and he doesn’t find us” the little girl liked the new didi.

Did he really think he could hide forever?! That I wouldn’t place the terror beneath the fear? He should’ve known better, after all, I had lived these years in the same prison to not place his fear misplaced.

Candy floss and chocolate together was a heady combination. I never knew how she could stand it. My little confidante nevertheless devoured her treats.

“I hide in the wardrobe when he comes. He never finds me”

“So what if he did?”

“Oh..didi..you wouldn’t believe”

She promised me a space in her cupboard. .” we would move things around a bit to fill you..and then we will hide you away..”

I had run out of chocolates. I returned home promising to bring more.

I killed my husband today as I returned home..he was lazing around the old couch watching TV. I didn’t know it was that easy.
“I know” was all I said.

About the Author:

Neelima K E has completed her Master’s in English literature. A native of Kerala, she loves to read and writing is her way of coping with the world around her. She writes short stories and dreams of publishing her books someday.

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