by Sowjanya M

A rotten apple spoils the barrel.

We all live in a place where even if a teetotaler drinks lime soda at a party sitting with a bunch of friends enjoying their alcohol drinks, the teetotaler will also be presumed as a drinker. With the recent news that is flashing around in every news channel- the drug racket. The person involved and the list of recent contacts are all summoned for inquiry.

With respect to parents, a great person has said ‘Your children are not your children. They are the sons and daughters of Life’s longing for itself. They come through you but not from you, and though they are with you yet they belong not to you.’

If the above is valid and true. Then, For all the children-sons/daughters, ‘Our body is the greatest gift that is given by our parents with the blessings of God we all believe in; you are blessed to have a healthy body, love it, take good care of it, be presentable and you are what you feed your body.’ isn’t this true?

Along with feeding the right food to our body we should feed the right thoughts to our mind and be mindful.

 First and foremost, we are all humans and it is natural for us to judge.

So, do I believe in rotten apple injuries to their neighbors?

Half-heartedly, yes. I do believe this in some cases where the people you have to deal with is bossy & dominating and people who always pry on you, meddlesome in all that you do and you believe they are merely energy drainers and mass of negativity; you have to refrain yourself from being closely acquainted with them as they are the set of people who mount their opinions and decisions on you. All that you know about them will be the tip of the ice-berg but you may assume that you know them at great lengths. There may also be chances where you end up allowing them to hold the reins of your life in their hands.

On the other hand, I do not like to be judgmental about the people I choose to be around. After all, friendship is a relationship we make and will always be for a lifetime either as lessons or as blessings. At work, we may like to work with some people and while we do not like to with others, the world is round, we have to maintain a healthy professional environment for which you have to be assertive and collective than emotional and abusive. At home, you may have neighbors frequently asking invasive questions and throwing crazy tantrums; of course, you always have the option to move away but handling them well will be the arduous task.

You are no robot or person with supernatural powers to predict the future or read their mind. A single act of kindness and little goodness will also make us believe the other person is good to befriend. There are also situations where the person you have misjudged and misunderstood as not to be a good person just by their views/words or a single deed, turn out to be a person with great values. Then it makes you feel like having found crystal of sugar in a pile of salt.

Everybody should be given a fair chance to change and one should not judge by their past deeds. There is always scope for betterment and growth as an individual. So, I will not completely agree with it. Until unless things are not against your will and conscience and you are not doing anything against morals, it is absolutely fine at least to be acquaintance if not as friends.

I always feel the word is ‘Friend’ is overrated and underrated at equal measure.

Not everyone we laugh with are our friends, not everyone we are close to at the workplace, neighborhood, gym, educational institute, etc. are our friends, just because we know a person by a conversation or just by their face is not our friend.

It means that if everyone is perceived in the same way, no one is special. If everyone is your friend to the same degree, then friendship isn’t something unique.

Friends encourage the way people act-from what they say or do. Friends affect the ways that you think and feel about yourself. How your friends think about and respond to you will, over time, have a strong power on your insights of yourself. On one hand, friends can lift morale positively, but on the other, they can destroy self-esteem.

Either way, they have an impact on day-to-day life. Affecting the people around them, friends can put pressure on people to do certain things good or bad. It is not limited to friendship circles alone, there could be possibilities that you find such people or circumstances among families and relatives too.

If you have to weigh, one side of how positive you feel and how good you feel about being with a set a people and on the other of how negative or awkward you feel to portray yourself fake, I would say your circle of friends says a lot about who you are and who you could become.

If “When the character of a man is not clear to you, look at his friends.” is true then,

“A man is known by the company he keeps and also by the company from which he is kept out.” is very true.

It’s all about being ethical and true to conscience, following your instincts, and being real you.

About the Author:

Sowjanya M is a software tester by profession and lives in Bengaluru. She is passionate about writing and her penchant for writing has helped voice her opinions by writing blogs on various topics and views on her blog site.