Articles

Me Too

By Sudha Dixit

The avalanche of “me too” movement has flabbergasted our society. All the dirt that was supposed to be swept  under the carpet of “honour” is being thrown out in the open. Men, specially, are crying hoarse in indignation and denying the charges. Obviously they will deny, it’s but natural, no  thief  confesses his crime unless he is caught red  handed or resorted to third degree.

The movement has originated in West. In the so called liberal and advanced countries too, women have been victimized at work places. They are sexually exploited, abused and made to compromise their dignity in  return for  favour. But those countries did show courage and fortitude to showcase and identify the disease. That rot is in no way absent in India. In fact it is more deep rooted over here. We chants “Yatr naryastu poojyante  ramante  tatr devtah”- meaning ‘Gods reside where women are worshipped”; Yet rape victims are blamed for being raped. How absurd!

The paradox is glaring – the land of “Khajuraho“ and “Kaamsutra” has extreme inhibition against sex. Here people  can “pee’ in public without being considered vulgar but they cannot ‘kiss’ in public and it is denoted  as  vulgar  so  much  so  that  lover  are  put  behind  bars, limit of hypocrisy. After reading Aravind  Adiga’s  Booker’s  Prize  winning  novel  ‘White  Tiger ”I  realized  that  men  are  made differently  than  women. They  cannot control  their  physical (sexual) urge while women can and do most of the time.

The irony is even then it’s women who are constantly restrained from having amorous desires. Unmarried girls (whatever their age), widows and aged women should not indulge in sex. How funny and how atrocious! No such  restrictions on men. After all it’s men’s world – at least so far. Of course, for the sake of social norms they, too, are  lectured against random sex . The lecture is not to be taken seriously. Even in rape cases, our senior politicians  breezily comment “Oh boys will be boys.” No one says“ girls will be girls“ for the same reason. Hence, the so called  boys- big as much as eighty years old (N.D. Tiwari) or young as much as juveniles, have soft restraining hand –“very bad, don’t do it again” and get away with rape and molestation.

Cut  to  the  present  scenario. Women  are  fed up  with  patriarchic  supremacy  in  society  and  men’s  hypocrisy  in general. Forget  rape   even  a  bad  touch  is  very  traumatic   for  a young   girl  or a  mature  woman. On  top  of  that  they  only  are  tut-tutted  if  they  speak  about  it. They  are  the  ones  who  are  asked  to  hush up  the  matter  and  keep  quiet. Why? Now   the  proverbial  urn  of  sins  became full and  started  spilling;  or  the  mythical  Shishupal’s  pardonable  count  of  abuses  crossed  the  line. It started  in  Hollywood  where  as  many  as  seventy  women  accused  Harvey  Weistein  of  sexual  misconduct. A big  film  maker  had  admit  guilt. After  that  other  women  also  came  out of  the  closet  declaring  ‘me  too’. The  movement  became  a  national  and  global  furore. And  why  not? Otherwise  the  rot will  continue. Instead  of  “ innocent until  proved guilty” it  should  be  “Guilty  until  proved  innocent”.

The so called VVIPs want to be exempted. Again why? What is VVIP, just a tag. Who knows the man is not a rotten  egg devoid of ethics or a swollen head misusing his position and power. The movement is real. To shush or abort it  would be sacrilege. Some say that men are also abused. Yes, so come out and speak. Also such instance is not even  1%. Centuries of misogyny and violation mentally, physically, politically, emotionally etc cannot be dismissed. People say it came from West. Still it needs support. It’s as much our cancer as theirs. Some say why old cases, why  ladies didn’t speak before? Is it easy for a young girl to speak out in the face of trauma. They are coming out now because of the social support. All those who are named and shamed are not innocent for sure. They did it and they  must face the music. Writer Geetanjali Arora spoke against it. She said that she will slap anyone who’d misbehave with her right away, rather than waiting for 10, 20 or 30 years. Well, everyone is not Rani of Jhansi. Our moral duty is to support weak and uproot the century old malady.

About the Author: Sudha Dixit is a writer and poet. She currently lives in Bangalore and had a career in real estate spanning over 15 years. She is a graduate of Aligarh Muslim University, Luknow University and Banaras Hindu University. Her articles and poems frequently appears in various online journals and magazines.

2 Comments

  1. What you have written is very true, Ms Sudha. In the earlier days the females who were raped had no support from anyone including their parents. Very often they would be threatened into silence. Today our society is a more open one hence even age old cases of rapes are cropping up. Some boys, old and young men are such terrible sex maniacs that they don’t spare even a few months old baby (girl). They don’t care whether it lives or dies as long as they get what they want.
    No female whether a Babe, a young girl/woman or and old woman is safe today in our so called well advanced society—well advanced in what–crimes, sex maniacs? Is progress leading to all this or leniency? No rapist is innocent whether young or old. They jolly well know and are very much aware of what they are doing.

  2. congrats ms sudha for your very, very well written article . Unless these sex maniacs, whether young or old or juveniles are publicly thrashed black and blue and abused nothing positive will happen in our so called advanced country where morals are blown to the wind and where justice is delayed shamefully … where politicians yap and wag their tongues in support of the rapists … wonder if they would open their bloated mouths if someone from their family had to undergo the same trauma and ordeal… this crime against women children and babes will only stop when such ugly, filthy men are hung on the crossroads